That feeling you get of relieving a memory. Whether it was formed from dreams in your less than conscious state or was a recollection of mundane activities done ages ago that you never really took notice of. The actual origin is unknown of yet.
Recently though I’ve been having a couple of déjà vu’s and although they start out perfectly mimicked, they later have a different reality than the one I saw play out in my head.
I take pride in this.
I am fighting against predeterminedness and I’m winning. I’m sky diving out of my linear path. All the unknown memories that should’ve ended in sadness have been rewritten. All towards a better ending I hope.
I’m growing as my own individual.
Just got back from Abudhabi. Man did i make a bitchin’ roadtrip playlist!
Well one day in the wee hours of the night when i had just come down to the kitchen for a glass of milk, to my unfathomable surprise; there was a rather porky leprechaun i found rummaging through my fridge.
He was pretty rattled by my presence when he finally lifted his head; somewhere in-between giant gulps of my hearty ale just long enough to take notice.
He panicked and ran right under the kitchen counter..
Course…that was his own folly cuz he without realizing had just cornered himself right there.
So as i closed up on him and he realized he had nowhere to run he yelped. ‘STOP! Please don’t eat me!’
I found this preposterous really. I don’t like eating the color green.
Out of curiosity though, i did as he said, stopping in my place and not saying a word either.
He then proceeded to bargain for his life….one which he hadn’t the faintest clue that i had no intention of taking.
He said that he was from a magical kingdom and that he was on a quest to find some low fat milk.
‘You see laddy..’ he said with the cutest irish accent ever.
‘Even though we do have cows in my kingdom…they are magical and thus too nutritious and high fat containing for consumption. We folk are getting heavier by the day and on the added down side we got magic to hinder our exercise and energy expenditure as it make us conveniently lazy.’
He then told me how he had heard of the low fat and skimmed milk variety of the humans and had come to find out more about it and if he just so happened to find a low fat producing cow on the way he would “zip zap and alakazam” it back to his kingdom.
But alas my stubby green intruder had only managed to make it a few miles on his journey before getting lazy and deciding to refuel in my kitchen as he was…as he described it ‘as weak as a salmon in a sandpit’.
Then came the actual bargain. He said that i could have as much gold as i could have asked for; as leprechauns are quite popular for that sorts. OR i could have one desired wish.
I thought on this for a moment.
It’s better to teach a man how to make money rather than give him the money he requires for the day…or something along those lines anyway.
I decided to ask him to teach me a skill most revered for the most important of important people. Something they couldn’t live without.
I asked him for amazing coffee brewing skills.
And that’s how it happened. I started my coffee empire which is now slowly taking over the world. One mocha flake at a time.
Note: This was a spur of the moment. I have a friend in abudhabi who calls me by a nickname she made for me ‘costa coffee’. I was talking to her while she was heading home from work and i told her i’d keep her company till she reached. She agreed and jokingly asked me to tell her more about myself. Yup. She got her answer.
Baby seal never give up!
I feel so bad for laughing hahaha.
You go seal! I’ll give you a kiss from a rose after haha
That black seal is so mean. haha
Saw this a few months ago…I really like how she had various wardrobe changes that fit really well with the character of the pictures. She’s freakishly skinny though and did she just walk through italy naked? lol.
- Socialism: You have 2 cows and you give one to your neighbor.
- Communism: You have 2 cows; the Government takes both and gives you some milk.
- Fascism: You have 2 cows; the Government takes both and sells you some milk.
- Nazism: You have 2 cows; the Government takes both and shoots you.
- Bureaucratism: You have 2 cows; the Government takes both, shoots one, milks the other and throws the milk away..
- Traditional Capitalism: You have 2 cows. You sell one and buy a bull. You herd multiplies, and the economy grows. You sell them and retire on the income.
- An American Corporation: You have 2 cows. You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. Later, you hire a consultant to analyze why the cow dropped dead.
- A French Corporation: You have 2 cows. You go on strike because you want three cows.
- Japanese Corporation: You have 2 cows. You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk. You then create a clever cow cartoon image called Cowkimon and market them Worldwide.
- An Italian Corporation: You have 2 cows, but you don't know where they are. You break for lunch.
- A Swiss Corporation: You have 5000 cows. None of which belong to you. You charge others for storing them.
- Chinese Corporation: You have 2 cows. You have 300 people milking them. You claim full employment, high bovine productivity, and arrest the newsman who reported the numbers.
- An Iraqi Corporation: Everyone thinks you have lots of cows. You tell them that you have none. No one believes you and they bomb your arse. You still have no cows, but at least now you are part of a Democracy.......
- Counter Culture: 'Wow, dig it, like there's these 2 cows, man, grazing in the hemp field. You gotta have some of this milk!'
- Surrealism: You have two giraffes. The government requires you to take harmonica lessons.
- Apathyologism: You have 2 cows. You do not care.
- Fatalist: You have 2 doomed cows...
- Atheism: You have 2 cows. There is no God.
- A West-Country Corporation: You have 2 cows. That one on the left is kinda cute.
- A Brazilian Corporation: You have 2 cows. You pay taxes for 6 cows. You have to sell one cow in order to pay the taxes. Your remaining cow gets sick and dies while waiting for availability in the public vet hospital.
- Russia: You have two cows. Since they are both female, if you happen to keep them in the same stable you will pay a 5,000 rouble fine for homosexual propaganda.
- PETA: You have two cows. You kill them both. You then use naked women to convince other people that killing cows is wrong.
- Moffat: You have two cows. Both of them are your daughters time traveling from the past where they had a brief love affair with Da Vinci making you the rightful Queen of England. As you assume the throne, you throw them off a building.
- Hussie: You have 2 cows. You ask for another one. Instead of getting just 1 cow, you get 2,485,506 cows.
- Romney: You have 2 cows. You are not the president of the united states.
- Once-ler: You have 1 cow. Everyone decides to make 5 different versions of that cow.
- Old Spice: You have 2 cows. The cows are now diamonds. I'm on a horse.
- An Irish Corporation: You have a million cows because they're everywhere
- Tumblr: You have 2 cows. You ship them together and make GIF posts screaming about how much you love your cows, but they should stop existing because they are so perfect.
- Also Tumblr: I give you a hamburger.
- Cows: The shit you go through.
- This post: Started off as a post that explained different goverments but then everything changed when the fire nation attacked
A Pastel First
Things i noticed while using pastels.
It always helps to have a sketched outline of your subject. Once you start using the pastels covering up a mistake in the original drawing would be tricky.
Working the edges, depending on the effect you want can either be done first or right at the end for a more darker outline.
Have a color that you would like to base most of the painting on and learn to work with different shades of it to provide variables in your work.
KNOW your color mixes. Most of the time your pastels will exchange their oily saliva and give you something you did not expect was possible(this would not happen to professionals obviously)
Layer your colors well and make sure you have an adequate amount of light and dark color in your piece.(depends on your painting)
FOR SOME REASON…an absurd color every now and then seems to work and adds a bit of character in your work. It’s really random and i don’t understand it.
Initially for brand new pastels, the texture on paper seems very chalk-like but as it gets worn down the pastel flattens out for the most part. (i used art paper in that picture so i have no idea what it would feel like on ordinary paper yet.)
It’s better to focus on one side of the pastel so that you have a really blunt end and a really sharp end on the other…or you could just buy a razor blade…probably.(i’m too lazy for that)
Your hand strokes matter quite a lot. The technique you use affects the overall look of the painting.
Applying too much pressure might end up damaging the underlying colors and would lead to ‘shavings’ being created. Avoid them as much as possible.
As with any art, don’t rush it. (It may look highly crappy and odd at first without most of the picture being colored in.)
Wait till you are entirely done and work on your touch-ups before you actually make a judgement on your work.
Eating pudding while doing all this adds to the enjoyment value.
Things i have no clue about
I’m still not sure whether it’s called a painting or drawing.
How the heck do you get those shaved bits out of the painting/drawing without having it smudge on and creating a mess.
Also how to prevent the many unnecessary ‘holes’ you get from using pastels.
Note: That was my first ever time painting with pastels. It was technically my way of getting a ‘feel’ for them. Heck i’ve never actually painted before. I enjoyed the experience overall and i know i need improvements so any more tips and help would be much appreciated :)